I heard we made out
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Randomize
