did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
4 words: hood of his car
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
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