I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Randomize
