help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
