How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
