I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
