what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Randomize
