No more Irish car bombs ever.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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