it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
do nipples grow back?
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
