she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
