You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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