New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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