Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize