i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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