Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
God gave him joint rollers for hands
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
