Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
zippers are such a cool invention
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
they're like a gay fantastic four
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
