I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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