Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
