YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
