it was like his penis was on wheels.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Randomize
