shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
