Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
