Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
