I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
it was like eating out sand paper
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
did i walk over a car last night?
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
