I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
