my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
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