You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Randomize
