her vagine was all disorganized.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Randomize
