I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
