Where is the hickey?
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
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