Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Your dad touched me again.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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