I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
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