So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Randomize
