i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
