So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Your dad touched me again.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
