That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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