I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
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