Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Randomize
