He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
