Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
