i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
