i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I forgot how hot balto sounded
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Randomize
