I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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