Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
