Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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