I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Randomize
