In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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