there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
We need to rekindle our bromance
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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