Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Randomize
