I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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