She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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